The Ball Behind the Love of the Court
12. Mom left me

When the sun is getting brighter the light is already on top of the head that makes my crown stung by the heat. I also rushed to go home because it was noon walking alone towards the house like a lonely embrace.

Even the people in the village are also quiet, or maybe they have taken a nap to rest physically and mind exhausting. Likewise, I will rush to rest immediately, lay down my body on a soft mattress with a hefty wishful thinking.

"It's lonely, like a dead city" I muttered to myself as I kicked the pebbles I stepped on the road ahead.

I can't stand by when I see that mom's not coming home. I want to call my mom but I don't have a cell phone. I can just sit and wait. I hope tomorrow I'll be home safe.

Before going to bed I went to my mother's room. Look at every corner with so many memories. Where mom and dad slept while trying to put my little one to sleep. Carrying while staring at the window and showing about the outside world.

Even when Dad left, this room was a witness when Mom expressed affection for me as a child. Hard life never made mother angry, but it made her so burning spirit.

Sitting on this bed made me feel the warmth of my mother. For a long time there was no hug, speech, or mother's attention. Disappear as time goes.

"Dad, mom, can you come back for a second. Putting me to sleep for a moment of loneliness here. to build a silent love with happiness like before" my tears can not be contained anymore.

Suddenly my eyes were on the drawer there. Wanted to open it to find out what's inside. I slowly opened the drawer, there was a paper containing the address of the house. But obviously it's an address in town not here. Wiping away the tears, I took the paper.

I don't know whose address I don't understand yet. Then there were some memorable photos between me, mom and dad. It turns out that the photo is still stored until now. Maybe you still have not forgotten your father, even though all this time you have been struggling to change foreign men in your life.

But still I don't know the clear status between mother and man. Especially the same cruel man who last came here and hit me. Even because of that man, mother hit me too for the first time.

Never mind, maybe at that time I forgot myself or. Maybe not intentionally. But in this heart still needs a mother.

The wall clock shows at 9 p.m., I rushed back to bed to rest. With bobo in my tight arms. Drowning in a beautiful dream world. Playing around in that dream that never came true.

*klek*my eyes peek small and then fall asleep again.

"Kukuruyuk" the voice of the chicken always faithfully woke me up.

The clock indicates 4 am. As usual, I rushed to do things as usual. Shower, worship, cook, and pack. My gaze looked at my mother's room, it was still empty and I hadn't come home yet.

Last night I had a dream that my mother gently stroked my head while sleeping. Maybe I carry this feeling too much in my dream to feel the affection of my mother in my dream.

Still this body standing in front of mom's room door. Then I immediately turned around to go to school. But the paper on the table got me interested in opening it. The paper made me curious because she was located in the usual place mom gave me pocket money.

It turned out to be a letter and an envelope containing some money. I don't know what the letter was, without thinking I opened it immediately.

\*\*\*\*

For my dearest daughter's key.

Sorry mom who didn't raise you right, never been a good mom for Key never even gave love to key.

This is all mothers do just to make the key comfortable, so as not to lack food as before. I couldn't bear to see Key starving, so I decided to work. To this day, she still works and leaves her own key.

With the arrival of this letter mom tells key that mom will go far. But the key is calm, the mother must send money every week for key needs. I also have prepared a good school for you after graduating Junior High.

Your tuition fee will be your responsibility until college. But this time the mother has freed the key and the mother will not stay the same key again. Take good care of yourself, son, I'll see you when the time comes.

Greetings

Moms

\*\*\*\*

"Muuuuuuuuuu" Shouted as he ran out. I don't know where this step is running, without a clear goal but I keep running. Hoping to still be able to pursue mother wherever she is. had the heart of once mother gave a very long letter to go.

When I got to the crossroads as the border of my village and the other villages, this leg stopped. Berselahuh crying so much on the roadside rice fields are deserted. I've completely lost direction.

"Momuuu, don't stayin keyyy hikkks, hikssss" An unstoppable broken cry. Like a dam that is a barrier but still hit by a flood of water. I screamed hysterically but there was no answer.

It's heartbroken, not the affection I get but the farewell letter.

"Momuu, key dear mother" My voice echoed bouncy into the sky. But only the little birds listen to it. With a neat uniform, now it has been shabby because the squat is not strong enough to withstand the bitter reality.

I came home with a step that had no purpose. It was broken this heart, seeing my mother go away and even leave me alone. My life is really a country that has no relatives.

The envelope is still in the hand. My steps slowly returned to the house that was now completely silent. No one was shouting because I was alone.

"Aaaaaaaa" I cried out in a directionless upset. Upset at me who can't make my mom happy. Being upset also could not prevent the mother from leaving.

*brak, brak* silent wall hit the target.My hand is hurt but I don't care. I exasperate sudha with a lot of emotions.

The wall that was looking at me in ruin, I hit it repeatedly. This hand vented out resentment and sorrow simultaneously. Many times I throw the clenched hand.

No matter what pain there is, it only comes across the pain in my current narrative. Kicking and doing crazy things, because everyone doesn't care.

"Aaaaaaa" Shouted and continued to shout, tears were also pouring down. Where would I tell you, when everything's gone, leaving me alone here. Really alone held in silence.

"Key doesn't need mom's money, key needs mom" I threw away the money in the envelope. A large enough nominal can not buy the affection of the mother. Can't even buy happiness key.

My body was curled up quietly inside the house where there was only a shadow of hope. One by one they went from the life of the key. What is wrong key God, why father and mother one by one go ninggalin key.

*klek* the door to the house is open, someone wants to enter. My head is still in sadness. That hand suddenly hugged tightly to my body that was covered with grief.

"You're why son, you're why" Ms. Yanti hugged me with affection and warmth. Right now my lips are still silenced by deep wounds.

I was just silent in the turmoil surrounding my life right now. I don't know what to say anymore, because I can only be silent without meaning.

"Had well don't cry, here there is a mother" Her hand tried to raise my head to look at her face. With tears in my eyes I looked at the face of the mother who was sad.

Slowly he wiped away these tears that were rushing. Gently darkened and tried to recover my broken heart. Sometimes he hugged me, then gently stroked the head that needed a backrest.

Ms. Yanti knew that I was still silenced to speak. Then his hand picked up the voice lying near me. His eyes read the words one by one and permeated them. His hand squeezed the letter and threw it in any direction.

"Basas mother doesn't know herself, she's not responsible" Hardik her self-defeating. His anger began to rise and insult my mother who had gone somewhere. Then his hands still hugged tightly and did not let me out of his arms.

I still cry in the arms of a mother but not my mother. Crying as a hiccup that cannot be contained even if only briefly. Tired of it, where else should I lean when mom's gone. The more desperate it becomes, the question continues to haunt without a word of way out.

"Momuuu" My hands are getting tighter hugging Yanti's mom.

"You are calm, son, I will take care of you" Once again his words made me cry.

How could my tears be wiped away by a mother but not my mother. How can a warm hug be given by a mother but not my mother.

Bu Yanti lives at home with her husband and has 2 daughters who are often called Nike mbak and Yeni mbak. Mbak nike is studying out of town while mbak yeni is currently in 3rd grade High School and soon will also be in college.

They were all good to me, no word of humbling or insults because they were really a very good family.

Ms. Yanti just kept hugging and comforting me who was still crying because my mother left. Bu Yanti kept on spouting words of entertainment and hope. Although actually the heart of Ms. Yanti was also angry because of the treatment of her mother who she considered irresponsible and left me without a word.

Just a letter that bears silent witness to the harsh reality I have received. The news shook my weary soul, as if it had been slapped by a blaring pain. Broke was forcefully struck by a state I did not understand at all. I can only be strong in something that makes me weak.

"Key, key why buk" said Yeni who suddenly entered the house. He also looked at me with a question mark. Bu Yanti just fell silent and did not answer the question from Mbak Yeni.

Yeni's hands continued to hold me who was currently weak. The question that kept Yeni confused but she remained silent because her heart collapsed seeing me with this situation.

"Yeni, please make a license for key and you take it to school" said Ms. Yanti told mbak yeni to make a letter for me. Because he knew I wouldn't go to school as fragile as a madman.

"Okay ma'am, Yeni will make it so that key can rest" She left us both inside the house. My mind was still empty, speechless.

"Have a son, you still have a mother who loves you sincerely" Bu Yanti wiped my tears again. Take me to bed and lay down this weak body. He also made a glass of warm tea to get rid of the mumbled.

Relax the most comfortable body, but not for now. The body is broken down because of the deepest pain. My eyes were swollen from the endless roar of tears. Bu Yant sat beside my bed, gently stroking the head that had a lot of mind burden.

His hands continue to caress, while his lips continue to sing as if the mother delivered her child's sleep as a child. I think sleep is the only way to get rid of the harsh reality. Back into the sleeping flower that I thought was happiness.

"Son, your test is the most beautiful then go with sincerity because you are not alone"

"Grandfather, grandfather" I hugged him tightly. Want to complain all about the pain that continues to haunt.

His words made me stronger. He said that I am one of the people God chose to be a good human being by sincerely facing all his trials.