The Essence Of The Darkness
EOTL Eps 124: A Forgive Heart
EOTL ( Essence Of The Light) - EOTD Season 2 - The Story of Xavier and Sera
Read ebook access will be available in November only on PROJECTSAIRAAKIRA website + PART exclusive mini novel bonus that can only be read there
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Sera let Xavier cry because she knew that the man needed time to set his heart. He did not move, did not bother, did not even ask, because he wanted to give his spare time for Xavier to relieve his feelings first before the man was able to speak and shed what he felt.
Sera was patient, waiting for the man who kept sobbing while drowning the face behind him, and did not try to interrupt Xavier who was evaporating his emotions.
Only after Xavier's sobbing sound subsided and the man's breathing had calmed down, and Xavier's embrace on his body was not as firm as before, did Sera try to turn her back to look at her husband, wanting to see how things were going.
Xavier's eyes looked wet, the man was completely pale, he said, with the dark circles around his eyes that were combined with his disheveled hair as if earlier in frustration the man had slipped his fingers into his hair in a haphazard motion.
Xavier's appearance was completely messy and waving, but in Sera's eyes, Xavier was still her most handsome husband in the world.
Sera's hands rubbed her husband's wet cheeks, her demeanor gentle and motherly.
“Are you relieved?” tanyanya.
Xavier smiled at how understanding Sera was towards him. The woman did not urge him, only being attentive which warmed her heart. Although the pain was still evident in his eyes, Xavier took Sera's hand and then kissed her slowly before nodding his head.
Sera moved her hands together to rub Xavier's hair, which was when she felt Xavier's hair was still soaking wet. The man seemed to take a bath and wash his hair and did not have time to dry it, then went straight to Sera in this treatment room.
“Your hair is still wet. If you sleep in this state, you can get sick tomorrow morning.” Sera lifted her body and carefully she sat on the bed, while wordlessly Xavier immediately followed her, sitting on the bed as well.
“Take me a towel, I'll dry your hair.” Sera ruled in a resolute motherly tone and Xavier seemed to have no desire at all to oppose. Dutifully the man stepped down from the bed and took a clean white towel from the drawer in the treatment room and handed it to Sera.
“Sit on the chair.” Sera who had managed to move her body to sit on the edge of the bed pointed to the chair that was nearby. The position of the bed was much higher, so it would make it easier for Sera to dry and rub Xavier's hair with a towel.
Xavier was speechless. The man then moved to pull the chair up to the edge of the bed where Sera was sitting there before he placed himself on the chair and turned his back to Sera.
Sera rubbed the towel in her hand against Xavier's head gently, trying to absorb the wet feel that was still thick there. Sera's hand slipped between Xavier's hair whose strands felt very soft on her palm and her lips extended a smile due to her warm heart.
Sera felt like a mother taking care of her favorite child, rubbing her hair and drying it. Her lips smiled when she imagined that when the twins were big, she would probably really enjoy rubbing the twins' long hair, then drying it and washing it with a beautiful braid.
“If you sleep with wet hair, it can be harmful to your health. Your head can get dizzy, you can even get the flu.” After the right side dried up, Sera turned the towel on her hand to rub the left side, perform the same drying process with a gentle demeanor and sometimes give a soothing massage on the surface of Xavier's scalp with his tiny fingers.
After painstakingly rubbing Xavier's hair gently, the wet and damp shades in Xavier's hair disappeared. Sera then put a towel that was slightly wet because it absorbed the moisture on the nightstand next to the bed. Sera's hand then touched Xavier's shoulder and began to massage her husband's shoulder with a soothing massage.
Xavier closed his eyes, his stiffened body from earlier seemed relaxed.
“Hmm...” The man hissed a scrumptious murmur as Sera's fingertips incised at the points that felt stiff.
“Pregnant?” Sera whispered slowly, pleased that her efforts were getting a good response.
Xavier smiles. “You who gave birth, I should have taken your foot off,”.
Sera chuckles. “Who said this massage is free? After this replace you who scolded me,” he said jokingly.
His joke came to fruition, Xavier raised the corner of his mouth slightly, forming the curvature of the smile Sera had been waiting for all along.
“I will massage you as much as you want, for whatever time, as you like, later,” said Xavier in a sukerela tone, like a fully devoted husband to a wife.
Sera's smile widened, the woman then bent her body and embraced her husband from behind. Xavier reciprocated the affection and attention with full acceptance, the man then turned his body around before placing his head on Sera's lap.
“I'm so lucky to have you, you know that, don't you?” Xavier's voice rippled as he spoke, filled with sincerity.
Sera stuck her fingers in Xavier's dried-up hair. The softness of this strand of male hair always amazes him, like a very soft and light fur, giving off a pleasant aroma of shampoo to breathe.
“I'm also lucky to have you.” Sera replied with the same sincerity. “That's why I'll be sad if you're sad. I've always wanted you to be happy, Xavier.”
Sera's voice was floating in the air, along with the silence created. Xavier seemed to prepare himself to speak, gulping his saliva many times before the man was finally able to speak.
“I have always hoped that the aplastic anemia I suffered was caused due to severe chemical poisoning when I had an accident a few years ago.” Xavier took a long breath. “It turns out, the contamination was just a trigger. I already have the genetic talent to suffer from that disease. I brought it in my genes and I might pass it down to my son.”
“Xavier,” Sera moves back her fingers to caress the man's hair. “We've talked about this before, haven't we? The notion that the disease is genetically inherited has always existed. But, from what I've learned, aplastic anemia isn't always passed down one hundred percent in direct offspring. There are cases of four brothers but only one is affected, there are even cases where the children of couples who one of them is suffering from aplastic anemia, they are all fine and do not get the disease. We still have hope. Even if the twins were sick, wouldn't the world of medicine continue to evolve in the future? We will hold on to the best hope and hold hands to face it.”
Xavier took a long breath. “I'm sorry for carrying a disease gene that harms our children,” he whispered guiltily.
Sera cupped Xavier's cheek and turned the man to face him.
“Are we going to repeat this scene continuously? You're the one with the guilt and I'm the one who's always trying to convince you that everything's gonna be okay?” Sera's smile was so sincere and she made sure Xavier saw it. “I don't need your apology, Xavier. I need you to have the determination to stay healthy, so that you can accompany me to raise our children later. I'm sure, if we hold hands and support each other, everything will be fine.”
Xavier smiled weakly towards Sera.
“Thank you, dear.” Xavier said sincerely. Sera's confidence in their strength together in facing the future has managed to arouse his spirit that had collapsed earlier. He was feeling much better now and somehow the man seemed to want to indulge in his wife's arms tonight. Xavier's head was stunned, looking at Sera with a gentle and warm expression. “I want to sleep by hugging you,” whispered later.
Sera smiled back. The woman shifted her body, then lay on her side of the bed attached to the wall, giving her husband enough room.
“Come here,” whispers gently, opens his hand to hug.
No need to delay anymore, Xavier stepped up onto the bed and lay in his wife's arms. A peaceful silence stretched between them, but Sera knew that Xavier was still not asleep, as if something was still troubling her mind.
Sera did not insist, she waited patiently, her hands rubbed her husband's back, wanting to show that she would always be there as a backrest if Xavier needed her.
“Sera?”
In the end, after a long silence between them, it was Xavier himself who broke the silence by calling his wife's name.
“Ya?” Sera said quietly, trying not to sound too demanding.
“I... finally found my real father.” Xavier's voice was stuck in his throat. “I was hoping for a different result, but the blood test showed that he was really my father.”
And so, after Xavier decided to open up and tell a story, sentence after sentence flowed from his mouth, telling Sera everything that happened without a single one being missed.
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Credence turned his head when Xavier appeared at the end of the hall. From his footsteps, it was clear that Xavier was reluctant to come to this corner of the intensive care room.
“Why should I come here?” Xavier stared at Credence, standing in front of a large glass window that featured a patient lying on the ground with life-connecting devices connected to his body. Xavier's eyes remained fixed on Credence with a sharp gaze, as if refusing to look in the same direction as Credence's.
“He won't last long. I think you should see it.” Credence spoke in a cautious tone, a little persuading though not pushy.
“Why is his face back to how it was? Didn't she have plastic surgery to change her face to enter the country?” tanyanya.
The figure of Rasputin doctor lying there is the figure of the original Rasputin doctor in old photos. The man still left a real look of his charm, although his good looks were defeated by the condition of his pale, thin and wrinkled body due to his disease.
“He apparently did not do plastic surgery. When he was brought here in critical condition, doctors found him wearing a very perfect mask with a quality that was almost indistinguishable from a real face.” Credence answered slowly. “I guess, it's the same kind of mask he made for Aaron.”
“So.” Xavier turned his eyes away, as if he could not bear to look at Doctor Rasputin's face. The more he looked, the more he found a resemblance to the man, and the more disgusted his soul became.
Why does he have to look like a father he doesn't want? Xavier would rather remain a stick of kara in this world than have a petty-hearted father who decided to throw her away even while she was still in the womb.
His conversation with Sera last night had healed enough of his sick heart and had fallen. The woman hugged him all night, calmed herself down and said that the most important thing right now was the current Xavier. The Xavier he loved, Xavier who became the husband and father of his children. While matters relating to Xavier's origin were rejected even since he was conceived, it was only a matter of being magnified and forgiving, for it was only then that a burning heart was contained by the flames of anger, you can be calm and embrace peace.
Xavier's eyes glanced back at the figure of Rasputin's doctor lying unconscious, and an insufferable tingle again smeared his heart, causing him pain.
Credence glanced at Xavier and observed his reaction.
“I apologize in advance for conducting an investigation without your permission. When the blood test results showed that Dr. Rasputin was really your father, I sent instructions to Dimitri in Russia to conduct a full investigation. Everything about your mom and dad is in here.” Credence pointed a small microchip in his hand towards Xavier.
Xavier's eyes glanced at the small microchip in Credence's hand, but the man seemed unmoved to pick it up.
“Do I have a living brother, now?” tanyanya.
Credence shook his head. “You have no brothers. You're the only child your mother ever born. Your mother was also an only child, as was Rasputin's doctor. There's a distant relative of your mother who's still alive right now. Her name is Lucy, she was the one who took care of your mother until just before her death.” Credence intends to provide some important information regarding the results of his investigation. The kind of information that Xavier should know because according to his observations, Xavier had no interest in taking a microchip containing the results of a full and complete investigation from his hands.
“Your mother died some time ago from pneumonia. Before she died, she asked Lucy to contact Rasputin's doctor and tell him where you were. From the information I have, in the past Dr. Rasputin asked Anna to abort her womb not because she didn't want to take responsibility for you. As a doctor, Rasputin knew that he had a genetic disease growing inside him. She was determined not to have children for the rest of her life, which is why she asked your mother to abort her womb. Your own mother wasn't able to do that, so she ran away from your father and followed her friend to this country. After she gave birth to you, she handed you over to the orphanage and then returned home to her country.”
“What's the name?” Xavier asked in a flat tone.
Credence raised his eyebrows. “Whose name? Your mom?” tanyanya. When Xavier nodded his head, Credence replied. “Name Anna. A very beautiful woman. I guess, you have an amazing face, not without reason, you are from two very beautiful humans. I have photos of her on this microchip. If you want to see it you can..”.
“Is it true what doctor Rasputin said, that he is an *******?” Xavier interrupted again asking in a bitter tone.
The question was really hard to answer and Credence took a while to strengthen his heart and nod his head.
“Unfortunately, yes. Your mother did it because she needed money because she was a kara in this world. However, after she gave birth to you and returned back to Russia, she worked as a laborer in a dairy factory until old age and did not sell herself anymore.”
Xavier nodded his head. “I understand,” he replied later, still with a bitter tone in his voice.
“Xavier. You should be aware that your father wanted your mother to abort you not because she didn't want you, but as Anna told Lucy, Rasputin's doctor didn't want to pass on her genetic disease to you. Your mother couldn't have killed you and given birth to you but she was forced to leave you at the orphanage because she couldn't support you, she herself had trouble eating, Lucy said your mother was afraid she couldn't raise you, especially if you will actually suffer from the disease as Dr. Rasputin told him when the man told him to abort you.” Credence gave a pause in his sentence to see if Xavier listened to him. After that, he also reconnected. “You know why Dr Rasputin used that mask? He did so because he wanted to help you in his last moment, he wanted to offer himself to replace Sera's father and lay in a hospital bed to disguise himself as Sera's father in order to outwit Aaron, because he knows that right now Aaron is moving to approach Sera's father.”
Xavier thinned his lips, his expression hardened as if untouched by Credence's words.
“Is besides kidnapping and drugging the head nurse at the health facility where Sera's father is being treated, any other movement from Aaron at this time?” tanyanya.
Credence shook his head. “Aaron is still holding and drugging the poor man in his house. As of this moment, Aaron is still not out of that house. I think he's collecting data and information on the head nurse and preparing to do his disguise.”
“Good. Set up an ambush team around Aaron. I'll come to Aaron soon after this, but there's something I have to do first.”
Credence glanced at Rasputin's doctor who was still unconscious, then he thrust back the rejected microchip towards Xavier.
“You really don't want to take this?” bargain carefully.
Xavier thins his lips and shakes his head.
“No. I'll bury my past after this. As Sera said, the most important thing is the present and the future. I will live those two times as well as possible and devote myself to making my wife and children happy.”
Credence watched Xavier's expression filled with solemnity. The man then nodded his head and put the microchip back in his pocket.
“Alright then. I'll go to make sure all the ambush preparations go smoothly.” Credence's hand moved to pat Xavier on the shoulder to give him strength. “One can visit a patient in there in just a short time, no more than fifteen minutes. Use your time as well as possible. Because, from what the doctor told me, the time of Dr. Rasputin is really not long. Say what you need to say and lighten the burden of your heart,” he said later before stepping away and leaving Xavier alone there, still standing glued to stare at the figure of the patient who was lying weakly behind the clear glass window before him.
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Xavier stood beside the patient's bed where Rasputin's doctor lay unconscious. His body was stiff and frozen, motionless, creating a stretched silence that was only marred by the sound of life-sign sensors and life-support devices connected to the patient's body before him.
Doctor Rasputin's eyes were tightly closed, his chest was up and down, and his airway was connected to oxygen which helped ease the breathing process in his lungs.
“They said you'd be dead soon.” Xavier spoke slowly, breaking the silence he created in the room himself.
There was no response from Dr Rasputin, of course. Xavier scanned the entire expression of doctor Rasputin and when he saw how similar the man looked to him, the bitterness crept back up.
“If you have to leave, then you can leave quietly,” Xavier's voice sounded hoarse and stuck while speaking, held back by the strange emotions that stifled his chest. “What happened in the past is the past. However, if without you and your past actions, this kind of me would not have been created in the present. I realized that everything is a destiny line that must be lived.”
Xavier stopped his sentence, his eyes still fixed as if he wanted to keep the face of doctor Rasputin in his memory, then the man let out a long sigh, as if wanting to release the entire burden on his soul.
“Go quietly. I have forgiven you,” whispered in a raucous voice, then turned my face and turned my back, dragging himself away from the room with a forgiving heart.
Xavier had already left from there and closed the door behind him, about to look straight into the future and not wanting to look back again. He did not see that there was a circle of tears dripping down to wet the pillow, flowing from the corner of the eyes of doctor Rasputin who was still unconscious.
It was a tear full of pain and gratitude from the heart of a father who was forgiven.
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The hello.
EOTL / Essence of The Light --> Xavier and Sera's Story. Read ebook access will be available in November only on the projectsairaakira + part exclusive bonus website that can only be read there
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